Jay here again, (the “paler” half).
I was wondering if any of my friends out there in Interracialand ever envisioned themselves in “mixed” relationships, (dating, marriages, children, etc) long before they happened? In other words, was a relationship with a person of a different ethnicity in your plans? Was it something you sought out? Or did it just happen for you, out of the blue so to speak?
Me, I always had a kind of curiosity about black women. It started when I was very young. I really can’t explain it other than to say that I found women of color very attractive. Hearing something like that said today sounds very strange– of course African American women are beautiful. So are Asian women, Latinas, Swedes, Poles, Brits, and Eskimos women. Well, maybe not Eskimo women. Apologies to all my Inuit blogger lady friends. *** Note, if you are Inuit and consider yourself an Ice-Hottie, please feel free to respond with pics. *** This is one post I’ll definitely have to “get wifey’s permission” to publish. Either that or take my chances that I’ll be sleeping with the dogs tonight…..
Ahhh, feels good to be digressing again! So of course women from all around the world are beautiful; no brainer. But when I was a boy, (back when the Lovings were battling it out with Virginia) little boys didn’t say such things out loud. Even as a young man in the seventies it was still a little rebellious to admit that a black woman was hot. Obviously at some point, I got over it, and so did most of the rest of the world.
Still, I never really thought about “going out and getting me one.” ***Now please don’t send nasty cards and letters saying I shouldn’t oughta talk that way– I’m being very, very, very informal– comfortable. Okay here: I never once considered seeking out a relationship with a woman outside the white-o-sphere. Thought I’d be a closet “freak” all my life. C’mon, you know what I mean!!!
I know I’ve shared this before, but it’s worth repeating. When the sweetest, nicest, kindest, warmest, most caring, loving, fun, exciting, interesting and adventurous woman steps into your life, it doesn’t matter if she’s orange. My wife rocks my world to this day. I am blessed and would feel this way whatever color God painted her. (Unless He painted her Inuit!) What I’m saying here, in my usual round the world in 800-words way, is that my wife; the woman I call my “best decision ever,” came from out of the blue. Now what about your Interracial partner??
Some might just consider themselves “open” to the idea of dating outside their race and culture. Some may be adamant that they will ONLY date other ethnicities, maybe they’ve honed in on a specific race they’re “targeting.” (All this sounds somewhat creepy to me as I type it, but I can’t really say there’s anything wrong with having personal preferences when it comes to appearances, personalities, attitudes and behavior, etc. And that’s all this really is– we want the freedom to choose a mate with attributes that we admire.) Wow. This almost sounds like the perfect argument to use with someone who’s anti-“mixing it up.”
Who of you out there sought out, or is seeking out an Interracial, Intercultural, etc. relationship? Who is open to the idea, but not seeking? These are the folks we want to hear from– drop us a line or three if you have the time to weigh in on this. We’d love to hear your reasons why only a man or woman of <insert color, religion, race, or nationality here> will do. How do you explain your attraction, or lack thereof? What attributes in members of other ethnicities do you find titillating, arousing, peak your curiosity?
If you’re open, but not seeking– what stops you? Mr. or Ms. “Something New” just hasn’t stumbled into you yet? Mom & Dad would go through the roof? Hesitant that things might get…. complicated? If that’s the case, know this: things get complicated whenever two people co-mingle. It’s gonna happen if you survive long enough in a relationship. So far, (eight years+) I can honestly say that the ZebraCouple has had no race-related “complications.” We’re just two imperfect, Loving humans co-mingling the best we know how.
Or, how about this curve ball? Are you open to dating outside your race, but only with a certain specific other ethnicity? What’s up with that? ‘Splain that to us all, would you please?
What’s in a name? What are the socially correct names for today’s ethnic and racial cultures? Because I grew up in a black and white world, I learned numerous names, labels, and some slurs of course. In time, some of those labels vanished– new ones took their place. Some of the slurs became acceptable, some are still guaranteed to raise (at least) an eyebrow. Just what are the preferred titles for the people of the world? One (not so) simple example: do people from England (or is it the U.K?) prefer to be called English, British, Brits, or another variant? Here in the states, at one time, (maybe still I’m not sure) black people preferred to be called African American. In the U.K., do they prefer African British? Oh, this is gonna be good. Confusing. I predict approximately 12 digressions minimum. Stay tuned……