Tag Archives: ethnicity

Moving on… some random INTERRACIAL stuff

As promised, I’ve returned to Zebra-Press to get a few thoughts down.  One of the problems, and reasons our posting slowed waaaaaay down, (okay stopped) was that issues, topics didn’t pop to mind often enough.  If this was a blog about, say, Michael Jackson— coming up with stuff over the last bunch of months would be easy.  But our topic– Interracialism isn’t exactly on everyone’s minds these days.

Now I know you’re probably thinking, Topic shouldn’t need to be on everyone’s mind– just some local loyalists. Oh.  You’ weren’t thinking that?  I guess that was me then.  Then I agree with me.  How very astute I am!  This is a blog.  It needn’t have “mass” appeal.  Just appeal enough for the good few who check in here.

My apologies again for the aloud thinking… and for yet another public apology.  But I did want to sort of warn that today’s (first real) post (back) may be a bit of a winding road.  So off we go…

My wife and I are considering writing a book about: 1) Interracial Relationships, and 2) our Relationship, although we haven’t yet decided which, (1 or 2) we will focus on more.  We have begun some preliminary research, and there is no shortage of material “out there,” difficulty will be sifting through it all; finding our focus (and voice); and, this should come as no shock– staying on track!  Yeah good luck on that one I can almost hear you saying.  Oh– that was me again.  Oh, okay and you way over there in the corner in the U.K., I see your cyber-raised hand.  Yeah, I know it’ll be  a stretch for us.  But we’re supposed to stretch in life.  Helps us live-grow-thrive.

I mention this very stretchy, lofty goal of ours not to make the public commitment goal-gurus suggest we should make before embarking, but because I / we’d love to have some of you come along with us on our book journey; that is, there might be a place in our discussions for a story of yours– or an anecdote, or, (with your permission of course) your accounts about what a “Zebra” life is all about.  And what it’s not about.  Who knows?  Maybe the opportunity to share 5-minutes of your passion as we do here, and hope to do on a little bigger scale someday soon.

As I’ve said, we’re really in the very early stages of thinking and working on this.  And admittedly, this has to be something mostly from us.  But I can not envision such an effort happening without significant input from others like us.  I’m thinking that effort might be in the form of survey questions, funny or uplifting stories, maybe an ugly scary story about racism.  From the get-go here we’ve welcomed your input on all of this– that will continue– with arms wide open.  If you are interested in possibly sharing a line or two for inclusion in, who-knows-what-we-may-end-up-with, please contact us via e-mail at: zebracouple@comcast.net

In the meantime, while that is simmering, we are serious about reviving ZebraCouple’s (Blogging in Beautiful Blah-Blah-Blah) Weblog.  That will continue.  Hopefully we (looking not just at you know U.K., using super-cyber vision to look all around the globe <wow!  Lots of Interracial Couples on the planet.  WOO HOO!  Way to go!!>) can build this spot back up, and even stronger, bigger (faster) (Remember Lee Majors as the Six Million Dollar Man?)  Sorry.

We can do this.  All of this.  Refocusing now, (like the laser beam that threatened Earth in that one $6mm Man episode) Sorry again.

One last FYI and note:  Previous posts have discussed some…. welcomed I’m sure…. and certainly never discouraged ANYONE from visiting and commenting here in ZebraLand.  Inclusiveness has to be a hallmark of this site.  But I’d like to spend a line or two (or three) at this point on a caveat:  Going forward, I’d really like our blog to stick to her Black-White Roots (Thanks Alex Hailey)– that is– we are an Interracial couple of the Black-White variety.  I learned very early on here that that means so much more from that global perspective.  And I’d never really thought about that before, what with my little Mid-Western perspective here.  I am thankful for the many comments and check-ins we’ve received from everyone… from all the different colored Dots and ethnicities around the sphere.  Going forward we’re certainly not going to close anyone out.  But while (I suppose) there are Interracial issues everywhere, the kinds of issues we know, and seem to discuss here, (Chicago, Atlanta, Detroit, Seattle, L.A., etc) — I don’t believe anyway– are the kinds of concerns or topics a Japanese woman with an Englishman– or an Indian woman with an African man for examples would care much to discuss.  Again, I for surely wouldn’t discourage anyone from checking us out.  I just want to reiterate that the focus here will be back to Black and White (you know– like the Zebra) issues.  Not to be snobbish, or divisive (if that’s even possible in an IR Blog), it’s just what we know best.  We’ve said this before, we’re neither relationship nor Interracial experts.  But we’re learning.  So much for that.  (Kicking the soap box back into the corner.)

We have some other thoughts and ideas about Black-White Interracialism in our heads too that we’ll be working on, but as always, please send us your thoughts on ANY of this dribble.  Your ideas, comments, and suggestions too on how we can make this a better place in cyber space for people who don’t have the same color face.  Ha ha– a little bad poetry for enjoyment before I go.

Thanks for checking us out.  Thanks in advance for taking the time to leave a comment or three.  Don’t be such a stranger!  Come back.  Take part in this.  It’s the Internet for Pete’s sake, it’s supposed to be INTERACTIVE.  (Okay, maybe not quite that “interactive.”)  ZebraCouple’s Weblog: Interracially Interactive & Intelligent.  There.  Now I can leave you with a joke:  What’s black and white and has three eyes (“I”s)?

You know how some people close notes and letters with the word, ‘Peace?  I’ve just come up with a totally unique and appropriate closing for our posts…

Stripes Everbody,




Filed under black and white, interracial, INTERRACIAL MARRIAGE, love, race, RACE MIXING

Involuntary or Premeditated?

Jay here again, (the “paler” half). 

I was wondering if any of my friends out there in Interracialand ever envisioned themselves in “mixed” relationships, (dating, marriages, children, etc) long before they happened?  In other words, was a relationship with a person of a different ethnicity in your plans?  Was it something you sought out?  Or did it just happen for you, out of the blue so to speak?

Me, I always had a kind of curiosity about black women.  It started when I was very young.  I really can’t explain it other than to say that I found women of color very attractive.  Hearing something like that said today sounds very strange– of course African American women are beautiful.  So are Asian women, Latinas, Swedes, Poles, Brits, and Eskimos women.  Well, maybe not Eskimo women.  Apologies to all my Inuit blogger lady friends.  *** Note, if you are Inuit and consider yourself an Ice-Hottie, please feel free to respond with pics.  ***  This is one post I’ll definitely have to “get wifey’s permission” to publish.  Either that or take my chances that I’ll be sleeping with the dogs tonight…..

Ahhh, feels good to be digressing again!  So of course women from all around the world are beautiful; no brainer.  But when I was a boy, (back when the Lovings were battling it out with Virginia) little boys didn’t say such things out loud.  Even as a young man in the seventies it was still a little rebellious to admit that a black woman was hot.  Obviously at some point, I got over it, and so did most of the rest of the world.

Still, I never really thought about “going out and getting me one.”  ***Now please don’t send nasty cards and letters saying I shouldn’t oughta talk that way– I’m being very, very, very informal– comfortable.  Okay here:  I never once considered seeking out a relationship with a woman outside the white-o-sphere.  Thought I’d be a closet “freak” all my life.  C’mon, you know what I mean!!! 

I know I’ve shared this before, but it’s worth repeating.  When the sweetest, nicest, kindest, warmest, most caring, loving, fun, exciting, interesting and adventurous woman steps into your life, it doesn’t matter if she’s orange.  My wife  rocks my world to this day.  I am blessed and would feel this way whatever color God painted her.  (Unless He painted her Inuit!)  What I’m saying here, in my usual round the world in 800-words way, is that my wife; the woman I call my “best decision ever,” came from out of the blue.  Now what about your Interracial partner??

Some might just consider themselves “open” to the idea of dating outside their race and culture.  Some may be adamant that they will ONLY date other ethnicities, maybe they’ve honed in on a specific race they’re “targeting.”  (All this sounds somewhat creepy to me as I type it, but I can’t really say there’s anything wrong with having personal preferences when it comes to appearances, personalities, attitudes and behavior, etc.  And that’s all this really is– we want the freedom to choose a mate with attributes that we admire.)  Wow.  This almost sounds like the perfect argument to use with someone who’s anti-“mixing it up.”

Who of you out there sought out, or is seeking out an Interracial, Intercultural, etc. relationship?  Who is open to the idea, but not seeking?  These are the folks we want to hear from– drop us a line or three if you have the time to weigh in on this.  We’d love to hear your reasons why only a man or woman of <insert color, religion, race, or nationality here> will do.  How do you explain your attraction, or lack thereof?  What attributes in members of other ethnicities do you find titillating, arousing, peak your curiosity?

If you’re open, but not seeking– what stops you?  Mr. or Ms. “Something New” just hasn’t stumbled into you yet?  Mom & Dad would go through the roof?  Hesitant that things might get…. complicated?  If that’s the case, know this: things get complicated whenever two people co-mingle.  It’s gonna happen if you survive long enough in a relationship.  So far, (eight years+) I can honestly say that the ZebraCouple has had no race-related “complications.”  We’re just two imperfect, Loving humans co-mingling the best we know how.

Or, how about this curve ball?  Are you open to dating outside your race, but only with a certain specific other ethnicity?  What’s up with that?  ‘Splain that to us all, would you please?

COMING TOPIC:                           

What’s in a name?  What are the socially correct names for today’s ethnic and racial cultures?  Because I grew up in a black and white world, I learned numerous names, labels, and some slurs of course.  In time, some of those labels vanished– new ones took their place.  Some of the slurs became acceptable, some are still guaranteed to raise (at least) an eyebrow.  Just what are the preferred titles for the people of the world?  One (not so) simple example: do people from England (or is it the U.K?) prefer to be called English, British, Brits, or another variant?  Here in the states, at one time, (maybe still I’m not sure) black people preferred to be called African American.  In the U.K., do they prefer African British?  Oh, this is gonna be good.  Confusing.  I predict approximately 12 digressions minimum.  Stay tuned……


Filed under black and white, interracial, love, race, Relationships, Uncategorized