Quick question for you all today:
Any of you have any issues when it came to choosing a church home? Until recently we’ve struggled just a bit to find a place that splits the balance between the type of church & service I was accustomed to, and the kind my wife was most comfortable / at home in.
I’d like to hear your stories. Have you had to compromise or settle? Or did everything fall into place for you, no issues whatsoever? How did you resolve any issues, such as: too white; too loud; too quiet; too “crazy;” too much or too little of this or that?
I’m thinking about writing an article to help those, like Que & I who had to search a bit for “just the right mix.”
Please, let’s hear from you………
6 Comments
January 6, 2009 at 9:58 pm
We aren’t church-going folk – my husband is Hindu and I’m an atheist by most definitions of the word. It’s rather nice having an area we manage to agree on.
January 7, 2009 at 8:22 am
Thanks for your comment Gori Girl. There I go again being rather narrow-minded; I guess I assumed some stuff: 1) that all couples are of the same faith, and 2) that faithful people congregate. I know this is probably one of those Western-midwestern-Christian-conservative mores I adopted when I came to the faith, but one I think most W-M-C-Cs would probably agree on. Still I respect the right of everyone to their own beliefs and actions or inactions.
By “agree” in this area, I assume you meant about church not being a requirement for either of you? It is nice when both are on the same page, isn’t it! But I’m curious. How do an atheist and a Hindu– a believer of any kind really– how do you guys manage that? I mean, doesn’t one of you believe that God keeps your heart beating and the planet warm and spinning, while the other thinks we’re no higher up the food and spiritual chain than ants and paramecia? Seems there would be some inherent tension there. I guess that’s a discussion for another blog . I’m still looking for Chirstian couples and their stories about finding (or not yet finding) a chuch home.
Still you know I am very grateful that you keep checking in with us. (I hope you can shake that atheism Girl– it’s cold & scary!) Just kidding, but only a little. Keep keepin’ in touch.
January 10, 2009 at 9:37 am
By “agree” I mean that we agree about religions relative impact on our day-to-day lives – which isn’t much. He’s an atheistic Hindu, actually so we’re fine on that front. You don’t have to believe in a deity to be religious, actually; Buddhism doesn’t, and the “academic” (for lack of a better word) version of Taoism doesn’t. And, as my husband testifies to, there are strains of Hinduism which don’t have use for or belief in a god.
I personally find atheism neither cold nor scary, but I doubt that this is a good venue for that conversation.
January 10, 2009 at 6:27 pm
Uhm, I agree. Not the forum for this. And now my head really hurts.
January 18, 2009 at 7:15 pm
Z- we practice two kinds of Christianity, so it may be more to the issue. We didn’t have trouble, since we currently split time. I think you have to talk about your desires and needs and balance them with your partner’s. It won’t always be easy, and it won’t always be pretty, but honestly dealing with these things can avoid difficulty down the road. My best to you in your search!
January 30, 2009 at 12:53 pm
My lovely wife is a Christian; I however do not consider myself as such. I believe in a higher power but that’s about as far as I go with it. We respect one another’s beliefs, that’s key. We also focus on our similarities and not so much on our differences. Lastly, we compromise…sometimes we’ll attend Church services together and other times wherever my mind leads us- religious service or otherwise. It’s all about balance!